Dun ReaD mY bLoG…

Perphaps it’s true. That i really is the kind of person who do things to my convenience.

If im tired, i hope my date, outing, everything can be cancelled, so that i can stay at home. When something unexpected happens, i prefer that the problem disappear. I prefer everything peaceful, simple and relaxed.

Im an escapist. Since when? Since i found out that the best way for me to deal with conflict was to not face it. For me, facing it will only aggravate the problem. Hiding away from it hoping that the problem will disappear suddenly is my solution. If it didnt disappear, i will reject it until it does.  They work sometimes, allowing me to escape from unwanted reactions. yea, escaping doesnt solve the problem but it shield and protected me. It keeps my self esteem from being lowered more.

Sometimes the problem resolves by itself and forgotten. Sometimes it didnt, it stayed inside my heart even though people who were in the conflict didnt pursue it anymore.

Let it go , let it go . i always say that to myself. Time will let things fade away. In between now and then, let’s just bear with the frustration and pain.

Letting things cool off isnt dealing with the problem. It’s not trying to take things easy. It’s just avoidance. avoiding to solve the problem caused by myself.

Today on my way home i witness something terrible that a mother can do to her child. It made me feel anger.

The mother was in her 20s (i guess ), she was with a group of friends.They were waiting for another friend who was using the ATM. When i was passing by them , the mother pushed the pushcart, together with the baby on it, down the walkway and left it to roll on its own. Her friend who was beside her stopped it. I thought if the friend didnt stopped the pushcart it will knock into the sides on the walkway. Her  friend said " you want to kill the baby ah ?" She replied:" Like that cannot die, must put it on a steeper slope."

She was saying that while i was beside them. i was shocked but i did not tell her off or what. i jus continued walking past them to the void decks. Then i looked back.. She really put the pushcart on the slope beside the walkway. I was so stunned. i didnt know if she released the pushcart or not, becos my view was blocked. when i got a better view they were already moving off.

I walked away but went back again to look at them from behind the pillars.. To my horror, i saw the pushcart moving by itself across the carpark and this time it hit the sides of the carpark. The baby jus jerked forward but did not fall out. The mother caught the handle after the pushcart was stopped and she was laughing about it.

It’s all god’s will and such things happen all the time. A woman have sex with someone and produces something she didnt want. When she didnt want something, she tried to erase her away. Hoping that it will really disappear suddenly. Of cos, she cant erase it so easily out of her life. She ill-treats it, condemn it so that god knows how much she hated it and help her remove it.

Yea, i m being an evil extremist. Yet that was what i sense from her.

TO ALL GIRLS:

Let us not be part of it.

              The Triangular Theory of Love

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         The triangular theory of love characterizes love in an interpersonal relationship on three different scales: intimacy, passion, and commitment. Different stages and types of love can be explained as different combinations of these three elements; for example, the relative emphasis of each component changes over time as an adult romantic relationship develops. According to the author of the theory, psychologist Robert Sternberg, a relationship based on a single element is less likely to survive than one based on two or more.

1. Liking in this case is not used in a trivial sense. Sternberg says that this intimate liking characterizes true friendships, in which a person feels a bondedness, a warmth, and a closeness with another but not intense passion or long-term commitment.
2. Infatuated love is often what is felt as "love at first sight". But without the intimacy and the commitment components of love, infatuated love may disappear suddenly.
3. Empty love: Sometimes, a stronger love deteriorates into empty love, in which the commitment remains, but the intimacy and passion have died. In cultures in which arranged marriages are common, relationships often begin as empty love.
4. Romantic love: Romantic lovers are bonded emotionally (as in liking) and physically through passionate arousal.
5. Companionate love is often found in marriages in which the passion has gone out of the relationship, but a deep affection and commitment remain. Companionate love is generally a personal relation you build with somebody you share your life with, but with no sexual or physical desire. It is stronger than friendship because of the extra element of commitment. The love ideally shared between family members is a form of companionate love, as is the love between deep friends or those who spend a lot of time together in any asexual but friendly relationship.
6. Fatuous love can be exemplified by a whirlwind courtship and marriage in which a commitment is motivated largely by passion, without the stabilizing influence of intimacy.
7. Consummate love is the complete form of love, representing the ideal relationship toward which many people strive but which apparently few achieve. Sternberg cautions that maintaining a consummate love may be even harder than achieving it. He stresses the importance of translating the components of love into action. "Without expression," he warns, "even the greatest of loves can die" (1987, p.341). Consummate love may not be permanent. For example, if passion is lost over time, it may change into companionate love.

( from wikipedia )